This time, two years ago, had to be one of the hardest times of my life...God had a plan though, as He always does and this is about Him and all He gets all the glory!
Julian and I had just learned I was no longer able to have more children. We immediately went to see a fertility specialist to see what our "options" were. We wanted another child so badly and as a wife, I felt broken, unable to give Julian the family we both wanted so badly. We followed the advise of a wonderful fertility specialist in town and started living our life in 2 week cycles. When I look back, I remember all the blood that was drawn, all the shot given to me and the ones I gave to myself...
After three long, emotional, hormonal months with no success, I laid on the couch with my head in Julian's lap on night crying my eyes out and said, "I can't do this anymore". He agreed and sweetly said, "you have always wanted to adopt we will talk about that after the holidays". Little did I know at the same time a beautiful 19 year old girl had just found out she was pregnant and God had plans for that 19 year old girl and her sweet baby that would change all of our lives forever.
In the beginning of 2010, we met with our adoption attorney, Glenn Lister and he basically gave us Adoption 101. We told everyone we knew we wanted to adopt. Four months went by and one day I received a call from a friend, in our church. That 19 year old girl I told you about was her daughter. They wanted Julian and I to come meet with them about possibly adopting a baby GIRL due in 10 weeks!! We could NOT believe it...God was giving us the baby we so longed for. McCarley Marian JeanAnn Scarbrough was born August 2, 2010 and long with her I gained a beautiful 20 year old "daughter" who I love as much as I love Tripp(our son) and Carley. We gained a whole new family...God knew the desires of our heart.
He took the brokenness in the words " you are not capable of having another child" and made those words "I AM THE GREAT I AM...with me ALL things are possible".
I titled this post "looking back to go forward" simply because I never want to forget how "needy" I am for God, His wisdom, His plan for my life and how He has given us far more than we could have EVER imagined.
Now, He has shown us that all the way around the world, in a a place called Wuhan City, I have yet another son. Mind blowing!
I never want to forget that pain of feeling such a deep loss because God picked me up and held me that night and said as He said in 1Corinthians 2:9~
"No eye has seen,
No ear has heard,
No mind has conceived what God has prepared
for those who love Him" AMEN!!!!!!
Sweet Trevor...hang on baby God's working out His perfect plan and we will have you home soon!!!